


The Trip Down Memory Lane

by BlackNightSystem



Series: Where Nobody Goes [1]
Category: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV)
Genre: Abuse of Authority, Angst, Demonic Possession, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Hallucinations, Hurt/Comfort, John Constantine Needs A Hug, Medication, Mental Health Issues, Panic Attacks, Past Torture, Protective Sara Lance, Protective Team, Psychosis, Ravenscar Psychiatric Facility (Constantine), Schizophrenia, Team Bonding
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-30
Updated: 2021-02-25
Packaged: 2021-03-16 14:35:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,658
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29084007
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlackNightSystem/pseuds/BlackNightSystem
Summary: When demon activity is picked up in 2014 on the edge of a small Yorkshire village, the Legends waste no time in devising a plan. However, what seemed like a straightforward exorcism is halted by John Constantine's own history with Ravenscar.Will a younger version of Constantine be able to assist the team in time to save an innocent life, or is it too late to try?
Relationships: Charlie & John Constantine, John Constantine & Sara Lance
Series: Where Nobody Goes [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2130459
Comments: 4
Kudos: 41





	1. Chapter One

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all, there's a lot of dialogue in this first chapter I know, just to set things up. Either way, I hope you enjoy!

A red light continued flashing in front of the team as they bickered over what they would be doing about it. Sara clapped her hands together and spoke over her teammates. "Guys,” she began, “can we please just focus. The longer we spend talking, the more chance we have of failing. Now, Gideon, where’s this problem?”

“Well, Captain Lance, it appears that there is a sudden rise in demonic activity. The source seems to be England, 2014. Reports indicate strange behaviour coming from Ravenscar Secure Hospital.” Gideon supplied helpfully after everyone had finally managed to stay quiet for more than a second.

With the issue clarified, the Legends began to loosely plan how they were going to fix it. The idea was that they would send in team A, Constantine, Sara, Nate and Charlie, who would act as staff and patients while they tracked down the possible demon. Undercover work had yet to go right for them, but with no other ideas on how to subtly break into a high-security hospital and wander around looking for evil, the Legends went their separate ways in order to change outfits.

John kept his place at the table, eyes fixed on the screen in front of him. It had been years since he had seen Ravenscar, picture or otherwise, and now he was quickly learning how wonderful those years had been. The large brick and beige-painted structure flooded his mind with horror he could never forget. John’s hands gripped the edge of the table, turning his knuckles white, as he tried to breathe at an acceptable pace. There was no way in hell anyone was going to get John back in that building. Besides, it probably wouldn’t even be possible, could mess with time. The man read over the dates Gideon was still projecting on the screen, with great thought. Over the course of a few years, John had found himself in and out of the psychiatric facility, never being free for very long. The chance that he would be there when the Legends were was high. It was settled then, he wouldn’t be able to go even if he wanted to. It was too dangerous. Constantine eased his hands away from the table and stepped back in time to see Sara, tablet in hand, making her way towards an armchair in the room over.

Constantine made his way up the few stairs in order to hover in the doorway. “Ah, Love, just the woman I’m looking for,”

“I saw you follow me in, John,” Sara said, unimpressed.

Clearing his throat, John tried and failed, to clear himself, “right, I’d found you,”

Sara changed the topic more harshly than she intended “what do you need?”

At that moment, Constantine realised that he really did not want to inform Sara of something she’d clearly forgotten about. Ravenscar wasn’t a memory he wanted to keep himself, so sharing it with others hardly sounded appealing. “I’ve decided to just sit this mission out, I’ve got important business back home to attend to,” he responded weakly.

“What’s so important that it can’t wait a few hours? There’s a demon out there Constantine, isn’t changing that literally your job?” She made a valid point, but it did nothing in the way of helping Constantine.

“Well thanks to being here, I don’t really get paid for it anymore so-”

Sara cut him off, wanting to avoid an argument, “you know what I mean. We need you to do the exorcism John, so you’ll have to come. I promise whatever it is you need to do, will still be waiting when we get back.” They were on a time ship, John’s complaining was anything but well-founded.

“I’m not going, Sara,” John spoke, raising his voice as he began to panic.

“Oh come on Constantine. It’s a demon, we need you to do your… thing. Besides, you’d fit right in.” Sara spoke with a smile. John couldn’t help but laugh along too, only for an entirely different reason.

“Aye, I’d fit in too well, Love, that’s what I’m trying to say. Listen, Sara. I’m being serious. I can’t go there.” John leant back against the doorframe with his hands in his pockets as he attempted to look calm. The last thing he wanted to do was remind Sara of his past but there was no way around it. Sara looked up from her device with a sigh.

“Okay, you listen to me, John Constantine. Whatever it is that you’re scared of, it -”

“I’m already there,” he interrupted suddenly.

Sara froze for a moment, taking in John’s words. She looked him in the eye before asking, “you’re what?”

It became obvious that Constantine would have to spell it out for her. “Think, Love. You know I spent time in a shit hole like that. I’m telling you that this time, that is actually the same shit hole.” John couldn’t keep looking at Sara any longer. He moved himself over to an empty chair while keeping his gaze fixed on the floor.

The realisation struck Sara suddenly. “Fuck. John, I’m sorry, I should have known that.” She thought for a moment before continuing, “is it the same time? Maybe you had something to do with it?”

“It’s the same time but I don’t know what happened,” John paused while he tried for the first time to think through what he was about to say before saying it. In many ways, he was still cautious about sharing too much with the Captain. For all he respected and trusted her, there were still some levels to him which he wished to keep private. He settled for muttering “I wasn’t exactly in the mood for keeping records at the time.”

“Right, fair enough,” Sara began, “but we still need you to do the exorcism.” There was the crux of the matter. There was no one else on the ship who was capable of doing his job. By leaving them for the mission, he was failing the team. For all John Constantine complained about not wanting to be a part of a team, he couldn’t go without the Legends anymore.

John smiled gently, “you could always send our Gary, he’s getting good, in his own way.”

He received a soft chuckle in response, “you’ve let Gary do exorcisms? That’s a terrifying thought. But no, it wouldn’t be right.” The pair sat in silence, considering their options.

Constantine was the first to break the silence. “Well if it’s me you really want to do this thing, it’s gonna have to be the old version.”

“That shouldn’t be too hard to do, surely. You love a good exorcism and no matter how often you like to tell everyone the contrary, you quite enjoy helping people.”

“Love, I was in a Loony Bin at the time, I really think you’re overestimating my joyful side,” John countered, shaking his head.

Again, Sara took a while to process what John was trying to tell her. “That’s where you were after Newcastle, wasn’t it? How long were you there?”

“A while, that doesn’t mean you'll catch me on a good day though,” Constantine responded truthfully. He thought back to what he could remember of his days in Ravenscar. The pain, the loss, the anger, clouded his thoughts and filled his mind with memories he had spent years trying to erase.

“We have to try at least John, and we’ll have to tell the team, you know that, right? Can’t have anyone showing up and assuming you’ve just decided to go method for this mission,” Sara made a futile attempt to add a dash of humour to their conversation.

John felt his heart rate double as he let the idea of the team seeing him as he was, sink in. “You can’t tell them, Sara.” In reality, he saw the idiocy behind his demand, but he’d never been too good at staying grounded in reality.

Sara caught the tension filling John’s body and left her chair to stand near him, offering comfort if he wanted such. “They won’t judge you, John. We’ve all been in dark places before. It’s okay to be a little vulnerable every now and then.”

“Right, as if you believe that yourself.” They both knew Sara had never lived by her own rule, and Constantine wasn’t likely to take up the position for her any time soon.

Laughing, Sara replied “okay, maybe I’m not the best at following my own advice but we still can’t hide this. It’s too risky. What if someone thinks it’s the current you?” She was right and John knew it. There were far too many dangers if someone in the team were to see John in Ravenscar and assume he would recognise them.

“Sara, everyone in that place thought I’d just killed a little girl. Fuck, I _had_ just killed a little girl. It wasn’t a walk in the fucking park there. You can’t start mouthing off to that lot and drag them all along for a field trip.” John was quickly beginning to lose his train of thought, Sara’s hand on his shoulder doing nothing to help ground him.

“Fine, it’ll just be two of us going then. But I’m still telling the team why you can’t come,” Sara compromised. It wasn’t fair to show off a vulnerable, younger John to the rest of the Legends but the problem needed to be fixed and to do that, she’d need assistance.

“Fine. I’m not sticking around to watch, just so you know.”

A swift nod assured John that he was free to leave once Sara had made it to Ravenscar. She added soon after “understandable, but have you got any tips on how to cope with yourself? You’ve been known to be a little… prickly.”

John smirked at her. “I’ll help before you leave, I’m just not into watching myself. What do you need to know?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Any ideas for the future or feedback/constructive criticism is welcome!


	2. Chapter 2

“Gather ‘round guys, we have a plan!” Sara announced, taking her place around the table. John stood beside her but a step back from the table, distancing himself from what he knew was to come. Mick stayed leaning against the side of the ship, watching on yet more focused on his drink. The others did as Sara requested without a fuss for once.

Charlie smiled broadly at the group before asking, “so what’s the plan, boss?”

Sara considered her answer for a moment. “We’re going to take this slow for a change. For this mission, there can’t be any surprises or, well, it can’t be like it usually is. We’re going undercover and we’re going to have to do it subtly.” From across the room, Sara heard Mick grunt in what could be considered amusement.

“Why are you so worried, we just need to bust in there, Constantine can get the demon, we leave. Easy,” Nate assured her.

Ah, and there it was. Well, there ain’t no time like the present. “Slight problem with that one, squire, I won’t be cursing that place with my ugly mug any time soon.”

Sara looked at him in confusion for a moment, before taking over, “what John is trying to say is that he isn’t coming.”

The sentence began an uproar, each Legend speaking over the others in order to express their confusion. Behrad turned to Ray, usually the source of reliable information, for the sake of loudly exclaiming “wait, what?”

Zari spoke over the group when it seemed as if they were beginning to quieten down. Sometimes it was if she had to work with children. Better than working with the animals they otherwise acted as, she supposed. “That’s stupid. It’s his, like, whole thing,” she enunciated using elaborate hand gestures when she found herself unable to describe exactly what it was that John actually did.

Watching Zari closely, John took it as his time to defend himself. However, before he got the  
chance Sara decided it was probably best if she handled the situation herself. “He can’t go. He’s already there,” she spoke, direct and to the point.

Although no one seemed particularly surprised at the idea that Constantine had spent time in a psychiatric hospital, the only one brave enough to take on John’s defensive glare and actually voice their thoughts was Mick. “Huh, spent time locked up,” Mick looked over at John who made a point of looking him in the eyes, “not a surprise.” He took a swig of beer while watching Constantine as if daring him to say something. John, thank God, thought better of starting yet another fight and instead went for a series of mocking gestures topped off with a middle finger before moving on. “You can’t hide crazy,”

“Hey, don't say that,” Zari interrupted Mick, taking offence on Constantine’s behalf this time. She sent her best disapproving look in Mick’s direction.

Mick made a noise akin to laughter before commenting lightheartedly, “just because you want to fuck him.”

It wasn’t remotely true of course, Zari had far better taste than that. Horney, self-righteous British men just didn’t sit right with her, especially one who seemed to have an endearing look reserved just for her. Suddenly self-conscious of her own thoughts straying towards actually considering her chances with a man she didn’t even like, Zari hoped she hadn’t left a suspiciously long gap before saying “I do not!”

Ray, feeling increasingly uncomfortable the longer his friends argued for, decided to intervene. “Guys,” he called out, louder than strictly necessary. It seemed to work though, as the team sheepishly stopped their bickering.

Nate broke the awkward silence which followed by asking all the important questions, “I still get to be Team A right? Who are we going to be then? Oh, can I be a doctor? I’d be an awesome doctor!”

Again, Sara had to break the bad news, “actually, you’re not coming anymore.”

Nate looked personally attacked at her announcement. “What! That’s so not fair, I want to be a spy.”

From beside Nate, a hand reached out to pat him on the back. “You’d be a great spy,” Ray confirmed.

Moving swiftly on, Sara described the new plan further. “We need to get Constantine who’s already there, to help us. We need to think this through carefully here though. No offence intended John,” the man in question looked entirely ready to take offence, “but you can be quite difficult.”

Ray, ever the boy scout, joyfully declared, “I would be happy to talk to young John.”

“No offence, Squire, but I’d kill you,” a laughing John told him. Respectfully, but also in fear of his life, Ray shut up. Constantine only felt mildly bad for upsetting the puppy that was Ray, but needs must. He had briefly considered the state he had been in all those years ago, spending weeks at a time completely unaware of his surroundings. If they showed up not long before he checked himself out, there was a strong possibility he'd be willing to help out but if he’d seen Ray towering over him and smiling incessantly, no matter how lucid he was, Ray would have ended up punched at the very least.

Sara broke through his thoughts by telling the team “Charlie, you’ll also be coming along.”

That didn't seem to go down well. “Hey, how come Charlie gets to go!” Nate exclaimed, sounding genuinely hurt.

“They have a separate female wing, we need to cover all grounds if we’re going to find the demon,” the captain informed her team.

“Could just send Haircut,” Mick grunted, not at all bothered by the mission as it didn’t seem to involve him in any way.

“Can we take this seriously for once guys? Have you all forgotten what happened _last time_ we fought a demon?” Sara looked around at her crew, seeing that they at least had the decency to look slightly ashamed, herself included. “Okay, so as I was saying, Charlie and I will be going and the rest of you will be back up in case things get out of hand.”

A small voice that appeared to be distant and slightly out of it laughed as it said, “I think you mean _when_ things get out of hand.” Behrad received a sad look from Ray, who took it upon himself to reassure everyone that plans didn’t always go wrong. He quickly shut up once more when he saw his friends’ reactions. 

__

* * *

Sara and Charlie went off to find the appropriate clothing for the mission; in Charlie’s case that was something more neutral, and Sara had Gideon find the right nurse’s outfit for the time and place. As cool as being a doctor seemed, Sara realised it would be much harder to fake that one for more than an hour. “Captain Lance, we have arrived at Ravenscar.”

“Thanks, Gideon. Charlie, are you ready?’ Sara asked her companion who had been sitting diligently nearby drinking something definitely alcoholic. John took it from her and drank.

Ignoring Constantine’s actions, Charlie responded “as I’ll ever be,” as she rose from her seat.

“Okay then guys, let’s-“

John interrupted Sara before she had a chance to embarrass herself, “skip the intro, love. Time is of the essence and all that.”

Sighing, Sara submitted. “Right, okay, probably not appropriate anyway.” The team made their way over to the table once more where Gideon had projected countless files and reports about suspicious behaviour and goings-on in Ravenscar Secure Hospital. Amongst the documents was Constantine’s own file, a fact he was deliberately trying to overlook. Sara had decided against reading the thing, instead simply asking John directly about his time there. She stood closer to the man and spoke just loud enough for him to hear. “Are you going to be okay?”

“Oh don’t worry ‘bout me, love. Fit as a fiddle I am,” he replied casually.

“John…” Sara was unimpressed.

More solemnly this time, John assured her, “I’ll be fine, love. But watch your back in there, it ain’t pretty,”

“Thanks, John,” she said honestly. “Right, comms in, it’s time to go,” Sara commanded, loud enough for the whole group to hear. Comms in, Charlie and Sara made their exit. Gideon had luckily hidden the Waverider without prompting as they had landed in the middle of a wide-open field. The last thing they needed on their conscience was a bunch of unstable people driven insane by the sight of something no one would ever believe them about. Not that it hadn’t happened before, of course.

Snaking its way through the fields was a large road leading out from the main town. At the side of that road sat a turning, leading to the very building they were searching for. The building itself was unremarkable. From the way John had looked at the image, Sara had half expected to see zombies trailing around the grounds and rows of ravens glaring from the roof. Instead, the building was made of dirty red bricks with a slightly newer section that had been painted beige in order to make it look as inoffensive as possible. It wasn’t really working.

“You know what you have to do?" Sara asked Charlie, to reassure herself more than anything. The nurse outfit, although far more modern, was already starting to bring back memories. Charlie nodded in the way of response before checking her comm was secure and following the sign towards the reception of the women’s ward. Sara spotted what she assumed to be the main entrance and headed that way.

Sara had spent time with Charlie after talking to John, trying to explain what it was exactly that they had to do. According to Gideon’s reports, several previous patients of the hospital had filed police reports claiming that they had been treated poorly. An investigation was never opened however due to the fact that the one member of the local police department with any power and who seemed to believe in the claims that the abuse was the work of demons, turned up dead shortly after the report was made. Constantine had been little help on the subject, informing Sara that he had seen demons in Ravenscar but the likelihood that they were real was quite small. Surely John would have noticed if it was a real demon he was regularly chatting with though, right? If the sheer amount of evidence Gideon had accumulated about strange and violent acts throughout the whole of Ravenscar was anything to go by, clearly he had not.

Focusing on the task at hand, trying to ignore the possibility that she may be about to witness one of her teammate’s past selves be tortured unknowingly by a demon, Sara made it to the main door. A large set of steps stood in front of her and at the top perched large wooden doors that were anything but modern. One was left open, providing a view of the security point positioned inside. Luckily Gideon had provided the appropriate covers for both Sara and Charlie, meaning that getting through security would not be an issue. Charlie had identification and a list of medical records that should allow her to check herself in, and Sara had the paperwork to prove she was qualified, experienced and newly employed at Ravenscar. All that was left to do was find the danger. That, she had always been good at.

It wasn’t the first time Sara Lance had gone undercover as a nurse. However, this time she doubted it would have such a pleasant ending. She fiddled with her outfit briefly and took one last look at the ID Gideon had provided for her. The name Sara Jones was freshly printed next to a new picture of herself. It wasn’t particularly creative but as long as it meant the little adventure wouldn’t be traced to her 2014 self, it didn’t really matter. Taking a deep breath, she made it up the stairs.

A short, widely-built man took a moment to look her over before he smiled forcefully. “Ah, you must be Miss Jones, I’ve been expecting you.” His voice was far more upper class than Sara had expected but he seemed nice enough. “I’ve been told the Director has offered you a position in the male ward, rather brave of you.” The man, Peter, the badge on his jacket read, seemed to regret what he had said and quickly added, “I don’t mean to say that they are dangerous. We’re quite a small facility really, so there’s not much separation. One or two may bite on occasion but overall, they’re a harmless bunch currently.” Yes, that was entirely comforting. “I’m a psychiatrist here, you see, and I tend to be treating the more... interesting people. The majority are fine, once you get to know them.”

Peter walked back through security easily while Sara was checked over for any weapons. Luckily for her, the comms Gideon provided had long been adapted to not set off most metal detectors as the only way through to the rest of the building was to step through a large metal arch. As uncomfortable as she felt, Sara was incredibly glad that she had been talked out of smuggling in weapons. “Merely a security measure, nothing to worry about. You must understand that nearly anything can be used for harm in a moment of panic.” Oh, Sara understood that more than Peter ever could but she was not about to share that thought with the poor gentleman. Instead, she let him guide her down a corridor of what seemed to be offices. “The head wants to see you first, of course, then I do believe our lead nurse has appointed someone to guide you around the place. You will probably just be getting to know people for a while first, seeing how everything works around here.”

The psychiatrist finally shut up and opened one of the office doors for Sara, knocking first of course. A male voice called from within and Sara took that as her cue to enter. Not, however, before silently praying that she could get out of this place as quickly as possible. The doctor himself was already making her feel crazy. She opened the door and stepped in.

* * *

Constantine’s head was pushed back harshly against a headrest where, despite his best efforts to move away, it was strapped down by thick leather belts. The gag firmly in place stopped his futile attempts to call for help. No one would come, this was meant to happen. These people were fixing him.

Volts of electricity shot through the wires attached to his scalp, making his muscles spasm with pain and terror. Breathing around the gag was short and rushed, there was little time to slow down before the same feeling was forced through him once more. He’d signed up for this though, how could he complain now? Checking in had been somewhat of his own idea as he feared the alternative of being locked up in a prison cell with his own thoughts.

He had killed a child. Astra’s death and damnation were all on him and all of Ravenscar hospital knew that. They made sure he wouldn’t forget either. Constantine attempted to lift his arms up in order to defend himself but he found that those too, as usual, were strapped to the bed. It didn’t matter how many times he went through it, electrocution never got easier. Wasn’t that the point, though? He wasn’t allowed to forget the pain. You wanted this, they told him. And in a way, he did. Whatever deluded ideas some people held about electroshock therapy being able to cure people’s delusions and hallucinations were, of course, wrong, but the treatment did offer punishment. It offered John the chance to pay for his sins and hey, it could hardly make the ghosts any more terrifying now, could it?


	3. Chapter 3

The meeting with the head of the facility was much easier than Sara had thought it would be. Considering she had already got the job thanks to Gideon, there were no medical questions that she would not know the answers to but merely administration tasks and a general introduction. She had been assigned to work alongside a man named Doctor Roger Huntoon. Apparently, he had been in need of assistance anyway, recently, after another doctor had been taken ill, and most of his patients were signed over. 

After being informed that the man in question was currently running a group therapy session in a room far into the facility, Sara was given directions and sent on her way. The corridors of the hospital seemed anything but friendly. They stood as high, cream borders to the hideous, clinical linoleum flooring that ran through the building beyond the entrance and administration offices. Luckily though, the place was far less of a maze than she assumed it would be, so finding the large room in which a group therapy session was occurring had been easy. Sara opened the door as quietly as she could and slipped inside.

The circle of people seemed to, overall, ignore her. One man had stood up from his uncomfortable chair in order to talk about his latest success, and the rest had seemed to be listening with interest. The only man who did not seem remotely bothered by what was happening, though just so happened to be staring longingly at the door which Sara had just entered through. He sat up on the chair he had angled himself sideways on in order to look at the new woman. A brief smirk flitted across his face as he took joy in seeing Sara’s attractive self. So, John Constantine had always been a flirt. 

Constantine was wearing a simple white t-shirt and joggers as the other men were, yet he looked oddly naked. Without a tie dangling loosely around his collar and the filthy trench coat hiding his body, he seemed far smaller. The dark rings around his eyes and the stubble growing unbothered by human intervention made Sara almost pity him. Besides the blonde, untamed hair, he didn’t look like John at all. 

The man’s eyes stayed fixed in Sara’s direction, yet gradually she realised that he was no longer actually looking at her. Thankfully, before she had to spend any longer considering him, the man speaking sat down, and a therapist began to talk. Sara moved away from the door as the group rose from their seats and headed towards it. A man who couldn’t have been much younger than Sara appeared out of the woodworks in order to direct a few of the men back to their rooms. John, however, had not moved. Instead, he was greeted by the therapist Sara assumed to be Dr Huntoon. John sat stiffly as he was spoken too, managing to find it in himself to watch the man consciously. An arm reached out to drag him off his seat as Sara moved closer.

“Then it’s settled,” she heard Dr Huntoon say, “I shall reschedule our session for tomorrow.” He let go of John as he looked up to nod at Sara. “You must be our newest sacrifice,” he laughed kindly despite seeing John’s obvious discomfort. “Sara, I am Doctor Roger Huntoon. It’s a pleasure to meet you,” he lied smoothly, offering a hand for Sara to shake. She took it dutifully and smiled, still watching John. “Ah,” spoke the man when he noticed where her attention lied, “this is John, a patient of mine.” 

Sara made the first move this time, offering to shake John’s hand. “Good to meet you,” she said as she lowered her hand. John had blatantly ignored. 

“Actually, nurse Jones, could you take Constantine here back to his room? I have to clear up,” the man asked, gesturing to the circle of chairs. “He knows where he is going, so nothing to worry about there. I shall come and find you when I am done, and you can have the tour of the place.”

Sara bowed her head to show she accepted his request and placed a hand on John’s back in order to guide him towards the door. John, who clearly was not as oblivious to his surroundings as he made out, stepped away from her touch and marched towards the door himself. 

“He’s tricky, that one. Watch him,” Dr Huntoon warned her with a clear distaste for her friend before turning away. Sara followed John out of the dim room. 

Luckily, John had not ventured far, instead lingering around the exit in waiting. “I need a piss,” he announced when he saw Sara. Before waiting to be told he could do so, he walked straight past Sara to enter the nearest toilet cubicle, leaving Sara standing alone for the first time on the mission.

Realising it was about time she checked in with her team, Sara found a nearby, unlocked storeroom. “Okay, guys. I’ve found John,” Sara announced, pressing her finger unnecessarily hard on the comm in her ear. 

Before anyone really had the chance to respond with a sensible acknowledgement, Nate decided to ask his own questions. “Oh cool, what’s he like? Is his hair still blonde? He’s got to be dying it, right?” 

“I don’t think now’s a good time, buddy,” Ray answered him, putting a hand on the other man’s shoulder. Nate looked dejected, but at least he’d stopped talking. 

“Back on track, now. Sara, have you engaged the target?” came an unexpected voice from the Waverider. 

“Target? So we’re taking him down now?” Behrad asked innocently, yet he went completely ignored as at the same time he opened his mouth, Sara gasped and spoke also. 

“Ava?”

“Yes, honey?” the woman in question replied. 

From Sara’s end of the communication came a short, gentle click as she found a better place to talk and not be seen.”It's not as if I don’t want to see you, but why are you here? I thought you were busy at the Time Buero?”

“How could I possibly miss hearing you meet a young, rebellious Constantine?” Ava watched the man closely as she spoke to Ava. In fact, she had yet to take her piercing eyes off of him since she had marched through a portal onto the ship and declared that she would be running their side of the operation. 

“She thinks we’re gonna fuck, love,” John announced without a drop of decorum. 

“Oh, for - didn’t you say that you didn’t want to be involved?” Sara was undoubtedly fed up already, but it wasn’t as if she hadn’t expected the entire mission to break down within minutes of its beginning; it was practically a tradition at this point. 

Bitterly from his side, Zari muttered, “as if John is capable of staying out of other people's business.”

John, apparently aware of what Zari was referring to, fought back. “Come on, love, I said sorry! If you weren't there in the first place, it-”

“Can you two save your arguing for the bedroom?” Charlie requested from her own ward, pleased with herself when she heard the horrified mumbling from Zari. 

Surprised to hear the voice, Ray asked, “Charlie, how are you doing?”

“Not too bad, mate. You know they do jelly in the caf?” 

“Is that really all you have to offer us?” questioned Ava, who was slowly regretting her choice to join in on the mission. Apparently, the jelly was a crucial factor as Charlie and Ray managed to talk about it for a solid five minutes before Charlie finally told them that she had not seen anything suspicious, but she did have to leave them to continue her day. “Well, that was fun, but can we get back on track?”

“Sorry, Ava,” apologised Sara. “I haven’t got anything to share yet, just that I have found Constantine, so we’re getting somewhere at least. I’m quite good at this undercover work,” she decided.  
“That’s great, honey, what is-” Ava was cut off by muttering from Sara. “Everything okay?” 

Sara responded quieter than she had been before, “John is back. I have to go too.”

“Good luck, Captain,” encouraged Ray sweetly. Sara opened the door and left the storeroom, where she found John watching her patiently. 

“What were you doing in there?” he asked blandly. 

“None of your business,” Sara informed him. She gestured for him to start walking, and he dutifully obliged, assumedly heading in the direction of his room. The woman followed close behind yet paying little attention, meaning she nearly walked into John when he suddenly stopped. “Is this one yours?” she asked but received no response. Trying to look past the silence, Sara leant past John to unlock the door with an access key she had been given in her introduction that morning. 

Letting the door swing back into the room, Sara was met with a dull, plain room. The walls had been painted cream to stand out against the plain white floor and the dull plastic furniture,e which consisted solely of a bed and a set of draws. She walked in, John following behind. Unsure of whether she would get another chance to talk to John alone, Sara thought it was best to get on with the mission at the moment. She grabbed at John’s arm as non-threatening as possible. “John, my name is Sara,” she began. Her hand was still clutched around John’s arm, so she used it to squeeze gently. The man didn’t so much as blink at the change in pressure. “Can you hear me?” Sara thought to ask before the silence grew any further. 

“I know,” came the response a minute later. 

Despite being genuinely confused if he was even talking to her, Sara decided to go for it anyway and talk to John, asking, “know what?”

“It’s on your uniform, Sara. Why is there no ‘h’?” Constantine’s eyes travelled across a crack in the wall behind Sara, yet he succeeded in never looking at the woman. 

“You’ve lost me,” Sara admitted, although relieved that John could apparently hear her at least. 

“In your name, love; there’s no ‘h’. Bit odd. It must be some American thing. Why is there an American here? Have we met before?” With the last question, John’s eyes suddenly snapped back into the present world, finding Sara’s own and trying to read them. 

In hindsight, Sara should have paused to consider how she would answer that, but instead, she went straight in with “yes, well, not technically. I have met you in the future.” John, unsurprisingly, started laughing. He attempted to remove himself from Sara’s grip, and the woman let him, taking a step back. “Stranger things have happened, I promise. I need you to trust me on this one. We think something is going on here,” spoke the woman in a far too desperate tone. She’d already blurted out too much with bringing up the time travel, so why not go all-in on the first meeting? Hopefully, it would speed up the whole uncomfortable experience. 

“We?” questioned John. “So there’s a whole gang of you fucked up American time travellers? And they tell me I’m delusional,” he chuckled. 

Sara really had not thought this through. While standing next to John on the Waverider, the idea of just asking him to help find a demon seemed easy. However, why on earth would he help a woman he hadn’t technically met? He was paranoid, and he was delusional, but talking to John's past version seemed so familiar to her. Rather worryingly, apparently not much had changed with him. Sara needed to find a reason why he should believe her, she needed to play with what she knew about him. There was no way he’d just go about his rather structured day as normal if he thought people were in danger from something only he knew how to stop. 

“John, I need you to listen to me,” Sara requested, waiting for him to nod in understanding. He didn’t, but she ploughed on anyway. “You know this isn’t impossible. You do magic, John, and we think there could be a demon -” something broke. 

“I don’t do magic. I can’t do it, it’s not real, I won’t do it again,” he began ranting, stepping away to press his back firmly against the cream wall.

“Oh shit,” Sara muttered to herself. “Okay, John, it’s not real then, yeah?” She tried to calm him down as quickly as possible, but clearly, she had overstepped the mark. 

“No! No, there isn’t a demon, there aren’t any. I’d fucking know, okay?” Apparently aware that someone was in front of him, although clearly not aware who exactly she was, John grabbed Sara’s shoulders painfully. “They want me. You’re gonna take me, right? That’s why you’re here?” The woman tried to respond, but John’s grip on her tightened impossibly, making her gasp in pain. “Fuck off, you hear me? I didn’t mean to do it. It wasn’t meant to happen.” He was crying now, in a way Sara had never seen before. His accent was thickened, almost incomprehensible, while his eyes lost focus on reality.

“What the hell is happening?” asked a security guard who came rushing in, closely followed by Dr Huntoon. The guard wasted no time in pulling John off of Sara and pinning him to the floor.

“Wait,” Sara protested, trying to lean towards the man. Constantine squirmed under the pressure of the guard's knee on his back. Considering he was still hyperventilating, it was hardly a healthy or constructive method to calm him down. “He’s in pain, he wasn’t doing any harm. What are you thinking?”

A hand reached out to rest on her shoulder, far more gentle than John had been. “Nurse Jones,” Dr Huntoon addressed her, “Chris here will call for an orderly to sort this out, how about you come with me? It’s time we had a chat, I think.” The man left no room to deny the offer, instead slowly guiding Sara away from her friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this is a bit of a rush, so feel free to tell me if there are any spelling or grammar issues I need to fix!


End file.
